Choice & Change

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Choice & Change

The World’s Most Powerful Forces

Change creates the choices in our life, and choices create the changes. This is the essential law for living: Change and her sister Choice are in a constant and continuous motion of creation and the entire universe is the stage by how we can witness our impact on the process. Created in the image and likeness of our Creator, we are imbued with the power to choose and hence change the path and the impact of our lives. This is not a small tool in our toolbox of living, this is the most powerful tool we have to exactly create the world we seek – it’s a superpower.

 

The question is why don’t we recognize this power and what are we waiting for to make us happy that we can’t already create for ourselves? The answer is: fill in your own blank. Because we are a spiritual being having human experiences, we have to remind ourselves that this power is readily available, fully loaded, and is awaiting our command. We are in charge, and the more we attempt to manifest what makes us happy, the easier and more rewarding the process becomes. Like any other natural ability, talent, or muscle, if it goes unused it leads to atrophy. The key to reenergizing this ability to manifest is accessible through our inner voice. Our inner voice is our connection to our spirit-centered existence and the catalyst that provides the faith we need to achieve what we desire.

 

Children know this the second they are born and as poet Kurtis Lamkin has written: “Believing is all a child does for a living.” Giving control to what’s inside of us is essential to changing what’s outside of us.  Somewhere along our human path we forget that a vision, powered by faith, is what makes miracles happen. A child is exhausted at the end of every day because they follow their heart’s desire, and the universe delivers. They giggle and laugh and do it again the next day and the next and the next, and so can we; It’s our choice.

 

Final Thought: Choice is the power to change whether we initiate it or are reacting to change. Choices determine our lives. Choose wisely.

Lean into the Future

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Lean into the Future

A traditional tactic used in negotiation is to take two steps forward and then one step back. It gives the appearance of compromise, but if left to its own devises it eventually will have two-stepped its way into our world and will own some of it. Before we let that happen let’s take a closer look at the relationship between progress and its evil twin, regression.

Progress is advancing and regression is retreating. Knowing how to play one against the other is the key to creating positive change in our lives. When we’re in the moving forward mode we have eyes peeled on the horizon and can see the efforts of our attempt manifest as easily as is if our destiny was reading our mind. When we lean into our future we’re drawn by a new vision. And by keeping focused on that dream, we not only pick up speed we gain clarity and control. Conversely if we take our foot off the gas we could stall and become frustrated. Why would we do that? Because the pull of the status quo has history on its side and it will play out scenarios from our past where we previously gave up and subsequently, we were rewarded with a new “comfort zone,” a fancy name for a fixed mindset. These flashbacks can draw us into complacency and ennui.

To offset this alluring draw to stand pat, we need to use our vision to lead us. And to the degree that our vision can, it will in the process of becoming a reality, become the anchor for our new port of call. Arrival at our vision’s destination is a sign we’re on the right path. And as with any journey, it’s what we don’t know that makes it fun.

Final Thought:  Without movement there is no growth. To break from the binds of the status quo we need to create progress, and to avoid regression. Regression is a powerful buzz kill and it’s disguised as a comfort zone. Steer clear and have no fear.

Spot Removal

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Spot Removal

A Sixty-Word Short Story*:

Myra could not have predicted the convergence of events that had the powers that be scratching their heads. She surmised that no one else could have seen this coming either. One decision after another had been scrutinized to the nth degree, and yet here they were, stuck in indecision, floundering, trapped in a mental cul-de-sac. Time was running out, fast.

And more…

I think it’s fair to say that we’ve all made decisions on something or someone important, and absolutely felt it was the very best move we could make at the time. We may have been bullish about a relationship or business venture or even the stock market and we charged ahead with enthusiasm and confidence that our decision would take us to a new and better place. But somewhere along the way things changed, and what we originally strived to achieve somehow failed to blossom, turning our dreams into dust. Failure, whether we see it coming or not, can be truly profound. And sometimes like Myra, we find ourselves stuck in a bad spot with time running out.

When unfortunate or unpredictable situations and circumstances surround us, we can sometimes fall into a “deer in the headlights” trance and find ourselves struggling to find a way out, stymied by events and unsure of what to do next. The unsureness of change, and the desire to remove ourselves from the situation we’re in, adds stress and clouds our thinking when what we need most is to be clear headed. If this ever happens, here are a couple of ideas on spot removal you might try:

– Stay focused on who you are, not where you are. By detaching our psyche from the situation, we can gain a better perspective on our options.

– Slow down. When we get stuck, we sometimes struggle as if we’ve fallen into quicksand, and we tend to make decisions without thinking. Taking a breath or two before we act can provide a moment of clarity we need.

– Believe in yourself. We’ve all been imbued with the power to change. And just because we’re in a bad spot now doesn’t mean a better spot isn’t right before us. Often, as they say, it’s darkest before the light.

Final Thought: Being in the right place at the right time is always on the table when it comes to life and the opportunities that unfold before us.

* The Premise: Always 60 words. No more. No Less. For more stories like this
and information about my books, please visit www.szenzone.com

Whether Forecast

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Whether Forecast

A Sixty-Word Short Story*:

The moment had arrived, and Marilyn was feeling uneasy. It was time to move on, but why? Yes, she wanted a better life, and yes, she needed a change and yes, the relationship was exciting, but it meant leaving her old life behind. This would change everything whether she was ready or not. When the door finally opened, she ran.

And more…

There is an old expression, be careful what you wish for, you may just get it. The reason this idiom has lasted so long is because it’s essentially true. In fact, the original saying is very old and comes from Aesop’s Fables: “Be Careful What You Wish For, Lest it Come True!” If we apply this to Marilyn’s story it seems like her wishes were all in alignment for her, but the price might just be too high, so she ran. The point is that all change has its implications and when we let our dreams lead the way they can sometimes take us to unfamiliar and uncomfortable moments. And when they do, it’s up to us to decide whether to accept the price or not.

Whenever the word “whether” gets into the conversation, there are usually some alternatives and choices involved. Whether sets the stage for choosing and sometimes those choices can be painful, or joyful, depending on whether we like the choice or not. The trick to having dreams and bringing them to life is to create dreams that accommodate what is most important to us. Actually, any really good wish should include some important components that we deem necessary for our happiness. Remember that our part in bringing our thoughts and ideas to life is often rather small. We just have to be clear about what we really want, move toward it, and the universe will conspire on our behalf to deliver it.

Marilyn while in the midst of stormy “whether”, experiencing her “either/or” mindset, felt forced to choose the past over the future. But it doesn’t have to be that way; both are possible. When we dream with a mindset that already includes what currently makes us happy, we are already winning, and so we might as well wish for EVERYTHING we want, whether we need it or not.

Final thought: Whatever we think, we can bring to life. This includes dreams that add to the life we already have. Think BIG. Live BIG, makes for a hopeful forecast.

* The Premise: Always 60 words. No more. No Less. For more stories like this and information about my books, please visit www.szenzone.com

Momentum Builder

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Momentum Builder

A Sixty-Word Short Story*:

Halfway through the fourth quarter, coach Kyle could see his team was struggling. Their body language was telling him that they needed a mental boost. Coach called timeout, huddled his team together, and said nothing. The players stood waiting for his instructions, but none came. When the whistle blew, he said. You know what you have to do; do it.

And more…

Momentum is a real thing. It’s an energy force and it’s easy to recognize when we see it in action. There are millions of ways that momentum can emerge and change the destinies of the teams we cheer for and against, the relationships we begin and unwind, and the speed in which we move or don’t move toward our dreams. So how does this process work? What can spark a change in momentum and the force with which we move toward or away from our desires? What is the common denominator for gaining or losing traction, for starting or waiting, for rising or falling? The short answer is…. wait for it…, wait for it …., time’s up.

If you guessed that it’s different for everyone, you’d be right. Coach knew this, so rather than try to inspire with a motivating pep talk, he merely opened the door and let each player decide for themselves what needed to be done – what they needed to do. Coach instinctively understood that the power of momentum is sparked from the inside. It’s not what we observe or see or touch, but rather how we feel about whatever it is that requires some action on our part. It’s the answer to the question: What needs to jumpstart our internal game clock to get us off of our butts and into the game of life?

When we create lists of things to be done, be it household chores, friends to call or visit, books to start or finish or bucket list items to tackle and enjoy we’re halfway there because we’ve at least identified the goal. The hard part is finding the time, the energy and motivation to begin the process. This is where momentum can be our friend. By taking even the slightest step in the direction of the goal, we activate the law of momentum. One step, even a baby step, begins to unleash the power provided by a willing Universe to move us ever closer to whatever dream we seek while dismantling whatever inertia that has been holding us back. It works every time, and we know it’s working because it feels like magic. And that’s because it is.

Final thought: “Every journey begins with the first step” is the first sentence in the operations manual of life.

* The Premise: Always 60 words. No more. No Less. For more stories like this and information about my books, please visit www.szenzone.com

Hope Springs Eternal

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Hope Springs Eternal

A Sixty-Word Short Story*:

Stewart was famous for having a positive outlook on the world and was excellent at providing hope, and encouragement for tackling whatever problems his family, friends, and colleagues might be facing. He knew this was a gift and he was keenly aware that this is what people expected of him, and dutifully he never disappointed. Until one day, he changed.

And more…

“Hope springs eternal,” was famously written by Alexander Pope in 1732 in his poem An Essay on Man. It expresses an ability that we humans possess to always have hope, even in difficult circumstances. For some folks like Stewart, in our story, it can become such a strong perspective and way of life, that is literally can define a person. The truth is that we all have the ability to become an advocate of hope and faith and an evangelist for positive thinking. In fact, I’m sure we all know someone like Stewart, someone that somehow makes us feel better in their company. We learn to enjoy their insights, and the positive spin they provide on life’s constant challenges, disappointments, turmoil and angst. Where would we be without them, without hope? – Dramatic pause while we ponder this question. Ok, times up.

The short answer is nobody knows. Fortunately, Mr. Pope was correct in his assessment of human nature; we can always find a way for hope to emerge in our psyche, and I happen to believe that if we lose hope, we lose ourselves. This is especially true when outside circumstance exerts its power to change our world in what we feel is a negative way, and we think that there is nothing we can do about it. So often this is sadly true, it’s quite difficult to change the world just because we don’t like the way it’s treating us. However, we do have a mind that gives us the power to choose how we react to bad news and events, it’s just that it seems easier to say than it is to do. And maybe this is what happened to Stewart. Maybe he just was so bombarded with negative noise and hyperbole that he succumbed to the weight of it all. Let’s hope not.

Let’s hope instead that we can all spring eternal. That this Spring we hear the birds, see the bees, and feel the joy of new life all around us. Joy is a spark for hope and hope builds confidence and confidence can open new doors, and new ways to change our world – just the way we always hoped it would be.

Final Thought: Hope is the fuel that powers change and spawns new beliefs where anything is possible.

* Always 60 words. No more. No Less. For more stories like this and information about my books, please visit www.szenzone.com

Can you hear me now?

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Can You Hear Me Now?

A Sixty-Word Short Story*:

Veronica had studied speech in college. She learned the proper way to enunciate and project so that the message was clear and strong. She acquired a vocabulary that was exceptional and often fraught with obscure idioms and colorful metaphors. She was a student of communications and loved to engage in spirited conversations. There was only one problem: She never listened.

And more…

I like a good conversation and am lucky to have wonderful friends, students and colleagues that I can talk with. We learn so much when we hear the voice of another and not only the words, but the sounds that we use to express ourselves. It’s not only the vocabulary and subject matter, but the energy in the voice – the pauses, the breath, the tone and the projection that can be very telling about a person. And as with Veronica in our story, it can be quite impressive but it’s only one way. And for most humans, and the folks that I enjoy talking with, the most important component for good communications lies in the art of listening.

Listening is important in one-to-one conversations as well as in public speaking. A good public speaker and presenter searches her audience for signs of both engagement and detachment. Easily 70 percent of all communications is non-verbal, and so listening is not just about hearing, it’s about recognizing body language, eye contact and facial expressions and being able to translate what we see, hear and feel into a viable understanding and appreciation that communication is actually taking place. When we’re doing this right and our antenna is up, we’re able to create strong connections. When we don’t, not so much.

Humans possess a whole repertoire of communication skills and sadly we only use very few. This is especially true in the text heavy, social media world we live in where emojis replace sentences and “ghosting” is a real thing. Today there is so much information heading our way that we’re tempted to either simply ignore it or only limit ourselves to streams of data that only support what we already believe. Hence, rabbit holes, misinformation traps, and random offers too good to be true suck us into their web. And there we sit, unaware of what the truth really is, until we sink amidst the weight of it all.

I know this all sounds dire and it is. And I’m guessing that we all know people that have drank some form of Kool-Aid and just can’t be reached anymore. Maybe it’s happened to us. That all said, each of us is unique and we all possess the power to turn off the noise, or at the very least, we can open our minds to other possibilities. Once we begin to really listen and pay attention to what’s being served up to us every waking second, we can begin to be smarter about what we really know and hold to be true. It’s then and only then where the one voice that truly matters – our own inner voice – can be heard loud and clear.

Final Thought: The art of listening requires that we be truly engaged, open minded and in touch with our own inner self. The trifecta of understanding.  

* The Premise: Always 60 words. No more. No Less. For more stories like this and information about my books, please visit my blog at www.szenzone.com

In Stall Mode

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 In Stall Mode

Life is not linear by nature, it is more holistic and tends to let us have contact with multiple aspects of time and space and other pieces of the world simultaneously, meaning that we really are never untouched by the moves and motions of all of those around us. We are connected and we can create and cause events and outcomes to happen and just as surely events and outcomes will happen to us.

What about the non-events? You know those things that were supposed to happen, that we need to happen and if they don’t happen, nothing else can happen kinds of things.  It’s the stuff that is required before we can make a move or a plan or any change in our life. It’s the “once I get my new raise, I’ll be able to buy that _____(fill in the blank).” It’s the “I can’t commit to that plan until he/she approves the budget.” It’s the wedding date never gets set until “we’re really financially ready.” Non-events are self-imposed obstacles masked as milestones and they are as common to human nature as the cold.

Non-events stop events; that’s their power. When we think in linear terms as in this will net this, which begets that which creates whatever etc.  we easily end up in a stall position because some link in the equation isn’t ready or able to happen just yet. And thus we wait. In a stall mode we give up control and lose precious time and if we’re not vigilant, we’ll miss opportunities for something different or even better than what we originally wanted in the first place. Being stalled is the worse kind of ennui. It is the nothingness and nether world of dreams on hold.

Feeling stalled? Here are some ideas to get moving again:

– Examine the plan. Are all of the links in the chain really necessary? Is there a way to eliminate one step and can we get there another way? By questioning our path, we may begin to find a better way.

– Set the timer. Whatever we are waiting for should have a deadline. If we rethink the time we need, our impatience may help accelerate the process.

– Think like a dreamer. Rather than laying out a methodical approach, ask ourselves if we had a magic wand, what would we want to happen. Sometimes this is where a dream can truly be ignited because we shift our focus from the process to the goal.

Remember that the shortest distance to reaching our dream may not be a straight line. We may have to tack our way there. Smooth sailing…

Imperfection

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Imperfection

A Universal Human Reality

“There was the cat, asleep. The man thought as he smoothed the cat’s black coat, that this contact was an illusion and that the two beings, man and cat, were as good as separated by a glass, for man lives in time, in succession, while the magical animal lives in the present, in the eternity of the instant.” This is a quote from Argentine writer and philosopher Jorge Luis Borges. I found it in the New York Times best-selling book I just finished called Meditations for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman. I placed it here as a reminder that most non-human animals live only here and now and us humans, although we get to accomplish and experience way more than cats, also face each moment as a series of choices and rarely stop to just simply be.

In a perfect world, we can do and be anything we choose, and the journey is easy peasy. Unfortunately, the world is not perfect and by association neither are we. Being human means we believe that we can string moments together to achieve a perfect and happy ending, yet we often fail because by striving for perfection we fail to accept what we truly are – imperfect. And being imperfect means we sometimes make poor choices and choices are what determines who and where we are. Burkeman writes that whatever those choices have been they have led us to our current place and situation. And if we find ourselves not exactly where we wanted to be, it’s only because of our humanness.

Here’s the good news. Being human, we have the power to change. And the next choice we make can take us to a new reality. The key is that we have to accept the current reality of who and where we are – shaped by everything that came before this moment – before we can create a new dream. By recognizing what’s real and including it in our choice making, we can actually move toward better decisions and outcomes. Accepting that imperfection is a way of life sets us free to enjoy the life we have right now in front of us. In other words, acceptance can offset a fixed mindset which enables us to rejoice in the simple truth that every moment is its own reward; Take a breath, and breath it in.

For more stories like this and other books, visit my blog at www.szenzone.com

Insanity

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Insanity

 Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over…and expecting different results.

This is one of those truisms I really love because it applies to so many aspects of our lives.  From a golf swing, to relationships, to ad campaigns, to how we discipline our children, we can become possessed and motivated by a desired result; yet do little, if anything, to change how we get there.  Humans are funny this way.  We often believe that practice, perseverance, determination, repetition, and commitment alone are all we need to get what we want.  And yes, in some cases this is true.  Sometimes not.

At what point does the light bulb go on?  When do we realize we’ve been doing it all wrong and not getting anywhere close to where we wanted to be?  Well, depending on the subject, the light bulb may never light, flicker, heat up, or otherwise illuminate.  By repeating a script we’ve committed to memory, we actually do become insane.  At least that’s how it appears to others.

I know we can all think of any number of examples of how this process works.  And too, we understand how the pattern can be broken.  We remember with crystal clear clarity the moment the insanity left us.  These moments are significant because it teaches us the consequences of our behavior.  We learn that we don’t always have to do what we’ve been told to do.  We don’t have to live by another’s standards, and we don’t have to be satisfied with the same old results.

We can and should: adjust, modify, improve, and create our own pattern, style, approach, and formula.  Finding what works for us, writing our own script, is really what makes us special and unique. It’s not about doing things over and over, but rather better and better.  Adjusting and trying new methods cannot only net the desired result but improves character and confidence.  It allows for a new, more mature pattern to develop; one where predicting results is the first step in getting them.  One that when developed properly you don’t mind repeating over and over and over…

For more stories like this and other books, visit my blog at www.szenzone.com